The Sex Temptation, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Brain

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and guys utilize love to get sex." This is a fantastic summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where songs analyze great sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further because for these songs, having sex brings immense significance and effects.

Singles fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they believe sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex is great then the relationship will be excellent as well).

B.more frequently, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
So, rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical attraction-- such as long-term requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to communicate with truth when all those hormonal agents are cutting loose. Our body responds to somebody we are brought in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone (increases sexual desire), that makes the chance to make love with somebody we are drawn in to exceptionally tough to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel very close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are strong and uncontrolled , resulting in powerful feelings of attraction, enjoyment, closeness, wellness, and love .

When issues develop, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently justify by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, however the sex is fantastic!" They most likely would not admit it, however they prioritize physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their main hunting tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that a number of his customers have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys specifically in urban areas, sex is readily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be good?".

Nevertheless, North includes, "I presume this is a ' man' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to explain that chemistry is very important. Yet, chemistry is a given that we cannot manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it must be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry happen, though in some cases look these up it can grow over time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication uses off and reality hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you should balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This suggests integrating chemistry with good sense. While great sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner choices by paying complete attention to your vision, requirements, objectives, and values -- while feeling all those exciting triggers!

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