The Sexuality Deception, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Mind

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to get love, and men utilize love to get sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles translate great sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther due to the fact that for these songs, having sex brings enormous meaning and effects.

Singles fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two ways:

A.they believe sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready also).

B.more commonly, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, instead of looking at whether this other individual might be a match on levels besides physical destination-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to correspond with reality when all those hormones are running wild. Our body reacts to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts libido), makings the chance to make love with someone we are drawn in to very hard to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel really close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are useful site involuntary and strong , resulting in effective feelings of tourist attraction, enjoyment, love, closeness, and well-being .

When problems occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap typically justify by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is great!" They probably would not confess it, but they focus i was reading this on physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary hunting tools are sexual destination and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay men, states that a number of his customers have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men particularly in urbane locations, sex is readily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be good?".

Nonetheless, North adds, "I suspect this is a 'guy' thing instead straight from the source of a 'gay' thing.".
I do want to point out that chemistry is essential. Chemistry is a offered that we cannot control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry occur, though in some cases it can grow over time.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication wears away and reality hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to stabilize your heart (and hormones) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with sound judgment. While excellent sex is crucial for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying complete focus on your vision, goals, requirements, and worths -- while feeling all those amazing stimulates!

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